Just a dream?
by drowned- P
Summary: Eren wakes up at a strange place. No titans around here. Then realizes a painful truth...
1. Chapter 1

**Okay guys this is my first SNK fanfiction so, please, don't judge me too hard if it's too crappy for you or if you don't like what you read here.**

 **Otherwise, enjoy.**

Woods are a lot darker than easy grass fields. Sometimes, you feel like you've dived into a completely other world.

I had also that thought when me and the others arrived at this place. I only looked around and wondered. I mean, yes, in Shiganshina we also had woods but the trees here were the biggest I've seen in my whole life. Actually this place seemed to be very peaceful. So peaceful that I wasn't able to trust it.

"What's the matter, Jaeger?" a voice in front of me asked. "I... I can't really follow your words Corporal..." "I don't think you're really that stupid Brat.", he gave back. "What do you worry about? Titans? Your friends? Or have you never seen a forest before?" "I have been in a forest before, but—" "Then you should probably have recognized what we can use perfectly here." That was typical Levi Ackerman again. Short and quick as always.

A few seconds before we could start to discuss that loud, we heard a strange noise behind us. It sounded like someone or... something was running after us with very hard stomps. _Wait a second … running with stomps?! How is that_...

The stomping noises went louder with every second. I could see the others worrying more and more with every single second. Only the corporal had his usual look on his face.

"TITAN!" Petra screamed from one moment to the other. When I turned around, I could also see him. Or better, her.

The first time I saw a female titan. I think her height was about mine in titan form. She ran straightly right to our group.

"What are you thinking about everybody, FASTER!"

I already rode my horse as fast as possible, so I continued watching this haired bunch of muscles running after us. _Shit_. _The others failed_. "Fuck, I'm doomed..." "Hey brat, what shall this be?" Levi looked at me with a look not even a monster could have. "Get yourself complete _AND RIDE!_ " _My god_. _We're all doomed_.

The female titan first slapped one of us against a three. Then another one. One got stomped into a bloody mess. I continued riding with the others. It... felt wrong, absolutely wrong. Only one person had left fighting this titan bitch. _Damn, he could never-_

FATSH!

 _There he goes. Oh my god, WHAT AM I THINKING?! WE'RE ALONE HERE, CHASED BY A FUCKING TITANBITCH, MY FRIENDS ARE DYING AROUND ALL AROUND ME AND I DON'T FUCKIN' CARE!_

I looked down on my hand. Yes, I could fight her. I could beat her. Taking the human who leads this body out of it and eat her. Take revenge for my teammates. Yeah. _That sounds good_.

"Jesus Jaeger what the hell shall this be?" I could hear my corporal yelling at me. It sounded like it'd come from far, far away. _It doesn't matter_. _I will do it_. "I..." _He will definitely beat the shit out of me when we survive this_ , I thought with a small laugh."I'll do my duty as a solider." At the same moment something wrapped around my body and lifted me up from my horse.

"Holy shit-" "If he survives it I will beat the shit out of him!" _What did I say?_ I tried to twitch out of this grip. Damn it, little miss Titan really knows what she wants. _I am doomed_. I couldn't move my arms. Trying to bite on my tongue also failed. Her mouth grew closer and closer. And opened wider and wider, wider as even a titan could. _I'm doomed_. Slowly she shoved me into her goddamn stinking mouth. _I'm ABSOLUTELY doomed_. Shit. _Is this real?_ Shit. Oh shit. Shit _oh shit oh shit oh shit … SHIIIT!_

A moment later everything went black.

Beeeeep... Beeep... beeep...

The first thing I saw when I woke up was a bright light which made my eyes hurt a little when I opened them. _What_...

I wanted to stand up when I noticed a long, thin thing in my arm. It didn't hurt, but it felt strange to me. That was also the time I really saw WHERE I was. I, myself, laid down in a completely white bed. Also the rest of this room was completely covered in white, only with light grey tones if you would call it "color". Damn it, it was so clean, Levi would spent the rest of his life here. By the way... _Where is he? And where are Armin and Mikasa? Or generally everybody?_

"Hello?"

 _(And why the heck is my voice so quiet? T.T')_

Trying to stand up first failed, but finally, I could get it. From time to time, the steps hurt a little, but that would go away. I knew it.

I looked back to the bed, this thin, long thing was the only evidence I was there. I should better get out of this place. One step into freedom. A second step. A third. After the sixth or the seventh step all went black again.

"...ren?"

… _What?_...

"Eren!"

"Come on Jaeger, do you really want to waste your time like that?" ... _Wait_... _is that_...?

"...Levi?"

"What did I say, Arlert?" „But you can't just-"

"...Armin? Mikasa... Is that really you guys?" _Mikasa_... _Armin_... _Levi_... _you are really here with me_... I couldn't help but smile. Finally someone I knew in this place. But... why was I lying in this bed? I... I could swear I left it. "The doctor said, it's too early for you to stand up, Eren." With this words Mikasa grabbed my shoulder and pushed me softly on the bed again. Then I noticed, the three were dressed very casual. Did they had a day off? No, not all three at exactly the same time. But then it meaned...

"Why are you dressed like this? Do you have a day off?" "No, not at all but-" "And why do you look then like this? Where are your 3D Maneuver gears?" "3D... What?" They looked at me with suprise. Even in Levi's face I could see a slightly confusion. "And what is with the others? Petra? Jean? And what's with that female titan? Could you catch her?" The confused look on their faces only grew with every single word I asked them. "Ehrm... Eren?" Armin slowly raised his voice. "Yes?" He... seemed like he wasn't sure what he should say. "What ,or better, who... are you talking about?"

I opened my mouth to say something but instead my eyes widen in shock while I stared at my friend. WAS HE REALLY SERIOUS?! No, no , NO "This must be a dream, IT MUST" I muttered to myself. Did they they all lose their memory, or what was wrong?! "Eren, are you-" "I AM ALRIGHT MIKASA BUT YOU AND ARMIN SEEM TO HAVE A SERIOUS PROBLEM!", I shouted. " I mean... did you really forget it?" "Forget what?" Armin asked. Was he really serious?

 _No … no … No, you should know that's impossible Eren_ , I thought to myself. "Are you really serious guys?" "Erhm, I guess so." _Why, Armin? What have I done to you to get treated like this?!_

"All these dead people... our training... the blood... the titans which destroyed the wall Maria... all your friends and family members which were eaten by them..." The whole room seemed to be cursed by dead silence. "How... how could anyone of you being able to forget these scenes?"That was when I stopped. I felt tears coming up and I didn't really want to cry in front of the corporal.

"Titans?" Levi raised an eyebrow on me. "Do you... do you mean those big, fleshy, overstrengh creatures who eat humans?" "Y- yeah...", I replied. But why did he even have to ask? Levi let out a small laughter. "Seriously Jaeger, I know you had an accident and that stuff but did your brain really crash that hard hard?" He looked at me like I told a joke or something like that. Showed emotions. _Goodbye_ _reality_. My need to cry changed into a desperated laughing. "Even... even Lance corporal Levi drove crazy..." I rested my head in my hands. _No, this situation isn't real. I m_ ust dream, I MUST! Or why... or what...

"Did the brat call me 'Lance corporal'?" "I also heard that..." Armin replied, making Levi sigh once again. _M_ y _god_. _What is going on here?_

"Eren."

When I looked up I saw Mikasa ruffling a hand trough my hair. _Damn I have to look very desperated when she does such a thing_. "Tell us Eren." "Tell you what?" I asked her. "What you think, Eren. What you want to know. You..." She looked over to Armin and Levi. " You seem to be a little confused."

 _Well shit_. _Even Mikasa thinks I'm crazy_.

In this moment a doctor came in. Or better, he looked like a doctor. " I see you woke up again." With a smart smile he walked over to my friends. "And who are you?" I asked him. "Grensler my name is. I'm glad we finally meet Eren." He shook my hand with a slightly hard grip. "You know my name?" "Of course I do." His answers seemed to be quite short. "Do you have any questions? You've been away for a pretty long time." "Been away? For how long have I-"

" One Year. Seven months. Two weeks. Three days." With these words Levi glared at me. "And something about ten or twelve hours." Okayyy... He really counted every single hour I was in here? "We all three feared you would probably never wake up from this coma." _A coma?_

"But a few hours before I was just awake and exploring the titan-area with Levi, Mikasa and Armin and then-" I remembered my comrades getting slashed by this female titan. "Eren."

The doctor looked at me. My companions also did.

"I... don't really understand what you are talking about. I think the others are also not really able to." They just nodded. _Wait_... _Have I really gone that crazy? No, that's impossible, it's-_

"That stuff. In medicine circles it's something you'd call... coma dream. You see, no matter how damaged your body is, as long as you not die your brain stays active. And sometimes it happens that coma patients are dreaming during their coma."

Everybody looked at me. The doctor. Mikasa. Armin. Levi. They looked at me like... they were sorry or something like that. "Wait, so you're going to tell me that all was a-"

"I guess you must realize it Jaeger." _Could this be?_ I looked down to my hand.

"Eren I know it's hard but-" _No_. _This is impossible_.

"It may sound unrealistic to you but please, you-" _I guess I have to find out the truth_.

"Ouch!"

"Eren ,shit, what are you doing?!" _Why is Mikasa so upset?_

I looked down on my hand, noticing I bit so hard on it that was already bleeding. I could taste something of it. My salty, rusty, sticky, very own dark, red blood. My hand hurt really bad. I could feel a tear running down on my face.

 _Shit_. _My whole life was nothing but a dream_. _Goodbye reality_. _I'll see you when I'm dead_.


	2. Chapter 2

**I apologize for taking so long with this chapter. I was at first not really sure if should continue this story, but you see the result here now. Write a review if you have any tips to make the story better or any questions. That's it.**

Days came and went like there was nothing with more importance for them. A few days after I woke up Armin explained my actual situation to me:

This place where I was, was a house called "hospital". That I was in here because of my coma and that I would get eventually out of here until next week. When I asked him WHY I was in coma, Armin every time changed the topic. I thought I would find it out on my own sooner or later so I didn't really worry about

He also told me I would live with him and his parents because since my mom died I couldn't live in my old home anymore. I swallowed when I heard that. _When the whole thing with the titans was a dream, why could the death of my mother also not be a dream?!_ If my father was still alive or not was also something that nobody knew.

When I tried t ask someone how my mother died it was always the same game like when I wanted to talk about my coma.

Otherwise than Armin, Levi and Mikasa didn't visit me very often. The only time I saw them in hospital was when I woke up.

To my suprise Levi was the only one who were there when I left. No Armin. No Mikasa.

"Where is everybody ?" I asked Levi while I left the build. It was already night and a little cold outside. "Mikasa is busy with a class trip. She'll be back till next week." "And... what's with Armin?"

Levi laughed. "Oh come on Jaeger, you really want to tell me YOU DON'T REMEMBER WHAT A CONTROLFREAK Armin' s mother is? This woman would never let him go outside at this time." He shook his head for a short moment

… _Control freak?_

"... Are... are you really serious?"

"What?"

"I … I mean that thing with the control freak..." _Did I really say that loud?_

"Ehrm..." At this moment Levi grabbed my wrist. "Eren. Do you have any memories of a life without titans?" "Without-" "In a world where titans never existed. Have you got any memories from that time?"

I tried to remember something like this. No. _No_. Since I could even think I grew up in Shiganshina! Inside of huge walls. In a world... full of those stupid- sucky titans. "No..." I looked down on the ground while shaking my head.

"I see..." Levis expression... it looked kinda... _disappointed?_ He went right ahead in front of me over a road. "L-Levi are you..." "I'm alright Jaeger, nothing to worry about." "But your-" "Listen, NOW, carefully Brat." He looked over to me with his usual blank face. "When I say there's nothing to worry about, then there IS nothing to worry about. Understand?" I just nodded. "And..." He stopped for a moment. "Maybe... sometimes it's better when you don't remember something..." _Is he talking to me or his self?_ I couldn't remember the rest of our way to Armin but I could swear he stayed the rest of our way with that expression of disappointment in his face. _But_... _why?_

Okay. Okay, _Levi, you were absolutely right!_ Armin' s mother really was... Damn it, even this clean freak wasn't that OCD!

Just after I arrived I had to go to sleep. Because we would go to school tomorrow and I couldn't handle it with less than 7 hours of sleep. I accidentally laughed about it and... yeah... Let's just say that I'm glad she didn't even drove crazier at me. ^ ^'

" Poor fellow" Armin commented next morning "I hoped she would treat you more politely..." I told him he didn't need to excuse but it failed.

The school building (Armin told it was called so) was many times bigger than I imagined. The first thing I saw was a big gate of glass which showed the main hall of the building. "Wow..." It was fascinating. "Hey Eren, why do you act like it's your first time seeing a school?" _Maybe because it's my first time seeing a school_. "Let's just say... it's cool to be back again." I said with a smile. "Are you sure?" _I'm sure you shouldn't hear something else_...

"Armin."

"Yeah?"

"I think when I try to handle this situation, it should probably work. AND IN THE CASE I HAVE PROBLEMS, I WILL GODDAMN ASK YOU FOR HELP."

"O- okay..." For a moment he looked like he was sorry.

"Why do you stare at each other like a couple right after fighting?"

I turned around only to see the usual blank of Levi's face. "Ahm..." _Why is Armin stammering?_

"Do we really look like a couple?" Seriously, I really found this statement pretty strange. "For a moment you did." _Okay_... _Is that something good or something bad?_ At the same moment Armin turned around. "Armin what-" I tried to grab his arm but he was already running with a "See you after period guys" away. "Armin?!" A hand grabbed my shoulder.

"Don't worry. It's normal for him to do sometimes things that don't make really sense." Levi took a short look on his watch. " But on the other hand we should really go to our lessons now..." He stopped when he noticed I didn't move since he arrived. "Come on Jaeger, you just have to follow me. We're in the same class." "Class?" Levi sighed. "I guess you really have to learn a lot about reality..."

The whole concept of school here was surprisingly similar to our theory lessons in the training camp in titan world. Okay, okay, the stuff they taught here had nothing to do with titans but I could understand it.

After the first period Levi went with me to break.

"Eren!"

Somebody threw his self on me and pulled me into a hug. "Eren, boy, you're really back!" A voice said. _Wait, is this-_

"Hanji?" "And he remembers me!" She yelled out while messing up my hair.

"Hanji, please, sto-" "And I thought you were dead!" _Oh god, and her enthusiasm is as deadly as always_...T_T '

"Let him go Shittyglasses, you're going to kill him..." Levi said with a slight facepalm.

"Hey, you can't keep him forever as yours, Captain Cleanfreak!" Hanji laughed and continued to make a mess of my hair.

"Captain Cleanfreak...?" I repeated, not trying to laugh. "DON'T YOU DARE CALLING ME LIKE THAT YOU LITTLE BRAT." _Shit_. _He's dead serious_.

"Ehrm... Hanji?" No reaction.

"Hanji?" _Someone's home?_

"Hanji, _you're going to strangle me_..." Shit. I would wonder if anyone heard that...

I could feel myself going down on my knees. "Hanji... " I stood up. "Yeah?" "Please, don't do this again. I beg you." "Come on Eren, you had never before any problems when I did this."

She looked at me like a child who was told that Santa Claus doesn't exist. "But you also weren't going to kill me like that with your kind."

"Oh my gosh..." She let out a small sigh. "It's a wonder how much people can change in only one year..."

 _Change_... _?_

" And how your dear Levi has to think about it..."

" 'My dear Levi' ? " _And in which way did I change?_

" Yes, or do you wanna tell me you forgot the whole thing with him?" Her face of disbelievment grew with every word she said. " Which-"

" Nothing with actual importance for now." With this words Levi put a hand on Hanji's shoulder. "Right, Shittyglasses?" He started sqeezing her shoulder a little. " Ehrm... " " Is everything alright with you both?"

"..." "Yeah, everything's alright, sorry for making you needlessly curious Eren." "Okaaayyy..." _Seriously, what the hell is going on here?_

"Then let's go, Jaeger." Levi forced me to come with him. "Levi wait a second." "What's now your problem Brat? Did Shittyglasses confuse you that hard?"

" I STILL CAN HEAR YOU, CAPTAIN CLEANFREAK!" "Does it matter?" "Of course it does Levi! " "Guys..." "Listen Shittyglasses, stop being so hyperactive for fucks sake." "Me being hyperactive?! Damn it, I just act as usually!" " I know you are able to act seriously, so ACT SERIOUSLY OR I'LL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU!" "Levi...?" " I WILL ACT LIKE I WANT TO ACT YOU PIECE OF DIRT!"

 _WHAT did she called him?!_

"Say that again." Levi glared at Hanji like she was a titan. A titan over and over covered in mud.

" You are a big piece of dirt, dust and mud Levi. A HUGE CRUEL SHITTY MESS."

 _Shit, Hanji, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!_

Levi just contiued glaring at Hanji. _If he looses his cool now-_

Next moment Levi raised his hand, ready to punch whatever would stand in his way. _Shit_.

"Oouh!"

" Eren, what the-"

" And YOU should choose youre words next time more wisely, Hanji." She just nodded while staring at me. "Ehrm... Eren?" "WHAT?"

"Why did you do this?" "Are you really serious Hanji?" "Well... Yeah." I could do nothing but sigh at this woman. " I don't wanted this situation to escalate more than it was actually going to." You smashed a fist right into hist hroat!"

"And where did you learn to kick my legs away like that?" Levi already stood up again. _Shit. I mean, I CAN' T SAY I'VE LEARNED THAT FROM A PERSON THAT PROBABLY NEVER EXISTED!_

" The better question is since when you do such a stupid stuff." I said instead. "What do you mean by that again, Jaeger?" he asked back. " I ..." _Should I be honest?_

" The Levi I knew never lost his cool that fast." Levi seemed to think for a moment

" And the Eren I knew did'nt solve problems with violence that fast. Bad luck for both of us." _But a solider shouldn't be lead by feelings in these situations_...

" Do you really think I liked to punch you in the throat?" Levi only looked at me. It was that slightly look of disappointment again, now clear to see.

" ... Sorry for bothering you." With this words he turned around.

" Hey I didn't want to offen-"

"Everything's alright, Jaeger. Remember?" _Goddamn, NOTHING'S ALRIGHT LEV-_

"Let him be, Eren."

" THAT'S JUST SAID BY THE CORRECT PERSON!" I shouted Hanji in the Face. "Hey, calm down, I just wanted-" "AND WHAT WAS THAT THING THAT LEVI FORBIDYOU TO TALK ABOUT?!"

"Ahm..." She stammered around like she wasn't really sure if she should talk or not. "It... Well, it's ... let's just say, it's complicated. ^ ^' "

" Okay, what can you tell me WITHOUT GETTING BEATEN INTO PIECES?"


	3. Chapter 3

"Okay... And what exactly did she tell you?" Armin asked while he laid down on his bed. " She wasn't really THAT specifically." I said, sitting next to him.

"I mean, every second time Hanji murmured something about Levi would kill her..." I sighed. "And the rest of it was nearly too fast spoken to understand." "I see..." Armin turned around and grabbed a book. " But even Hanji should be able to talk useful stuff sometimes."

" Seriously Armin, she only talked about Levi. The whole time..."

"Ehrm... Eren, I apologize for asking this but why is it so important for you to understand what Hanji meant by something Levi interrupted her?" Armin asked and stared on the floor. "That's something that happens pretty often as you should know." "But that wasn't some thoughtlessly spoken shit like usually. I could hear that in her voice." "In her voice? That's just-" "And I also would really like to get some memories of my REAL past as you could imagine."

He looked like a child which didn't want to realize it had lost a game. "Seems like I couldn't do very much here." "What do you-" "You will have no chance to get the informations you want when yo continue to ask Hanji about it. She might be talkative, but one word from Levi and her mouth is completely sealed. The only way would be, if you really want to know what she wanted to tell you about, to ask Levi directly. And chances to get an answer from a question he doesn't want to answer are also very low. Especially when it's you Eren." "Does he hate me that much or what's his problem?" I asked in joke, on the one hand probably because I really meant it. "I would not call it 'hate'..."

On the other hand because I wanted Armin to look a little less dead serious. "Look Eren, when Hanji described the relationship between you two as hard to describe then she wasn't that incorrect."He just looked at me like he would tell me something unimportant like, for example, which part of the house was cleaned by Jean. "And if you really want to get a serious answer for your question I just can wish you good luck."

 _Well shit_. _Let's just hope that it will work_.

Unfortunately Levi wasn't that talkative in the next few days. Every time I tried to talk to him he went away or acted like he wouldn't notice. This situation lasted for two or three before I could even handle to reach him.

"Seriously, what do you want from me Eren?" He asked with a slightly annoyed voice after my WHAT-DO-I-KNOW-WHICH try. "You know exactly what I want Cleanfreak." He stopped for a moment. "And what have I done to get called like that?" "That was for ignoring me. -.-" "If it's nothing else..." He started to walk away again. AGAIN. _NO, I WON'T LET THIS HAPPEN-_

"WHAT SHALL THIS BE BRAT?!" ... _Why did I grab his arm?_

"I want questions!" "...You mean ANSWERS." Levi raised an eyebrow on me. " JUST TELL ME WHAT I WANT TO HEAR FOR FUCK'S SAKE!" "And... what do you want to hear?" _Goddammit!_ "WHY DID YOU FORBID HANJI TO TALK ABOUT MY PAST?!" "..." "Answer me Levi, NOW." "... It's complicated." _This is what everyone else said you-_

"Would it help when we talk anywhere alone?" I asked instead of yelling at him. He just stared at me again with that slightly disappointment. "And stop staring at me like this, that's just-" "That's just?" He repeated. "I just feel like I've done something wrong when you look at me like that." He looked at me for a long moment with his usual bored stare. "Eren, you did nothing wrong. Not you." "?" "Everything's alright." _Seriously, what is wrong with this guy?!_

"Hey what- WHAT ARE YOU DOING BRAT?!" "Going to the basement." "But why-" "If someone asks for a reason." I a said, grabbing his arm only stronger. Yeah, _this time I will definitely get answers_. An answer about what Hanji wanted to tell me. An answer about why Levi acts this weird. Something I did in my REAL past.

"Okay Levi" I said as we arrived the basement. "You will answer ALL of my questions completely and truthfully." "What if I don't?" "Then you'll get a fist in your throat." "You wouldn't do that again!" He looked at me in disbelievement as I could see. Seeing was generally pretty hard down here because there was no light in te basement.

" I told you it's no fun to do this." "And what will make me believe you?" Levi asked in his normal voice. "Just do as you told and nothing bad will happen." _I promise_.

"So, tell me now what Hanji wanted to say." Silence. "She... wanted to talk about the past." "I also know that." "You and me in the past." "And what's so special about that?" I asked while looking around in dark. "It..." _Damn, where the hell is he?!_ "It's difficult to describe it. Really." I sighed in impatiency. "Just tell. Say as you think. PLEASE." Dead silence. "Look, I don't have the whole day for this and you also do ", I said in the hope of making him talk by these words, "And as sooner we are ready here, that faster we can leave this place Lev-" In this moment something hit my head, making me go down on the floor.

"Levi...?" A kick in the chest.

"Lev-" More hits. More kicks.

"WhyuUUUURRRG!" _Damn it. Coffing blood isn't that good._

"Maybe you should go and play the titan slayer again... Jaeger." With these words Levi crashed my head on the stairs. His face... _I NEVER WANT TO SEE IT AGAIN_. Not the way it was in that moment. No.

 _No. I can't understand you Levi. Really. What is he saying...?_

 _Doesn't matter. My mind is already fading away._


End file.
